[Wife] on the Oakland Athletics scoring six runs off the Houston Astros in the bottom of the FIRST INNING:
"No way! You can't just give it all up like that in the first inning - that's not professional baseball! You can't just give it up like that, like a drunken coke whore at a bachelor party!
At least be like the friendly debutante after the ball - put up a good fight, let the other team spend time on the other bases for a while, then give it all up in the late innings - THAT I get.
But the FIRST INNING?! You haven't even seen all nine guys yet! Have some self-respect, Astros."