Fr: Ian
Re: Naked Cowgirl
Dear Mister Top,
Tonight on my radio, I heard you proclaim "last night I saw a naked cowgirl.
She was floatin' across the ceiling" and I find myself intrigued, concerned, and perplexed.
INTRIGUED because I have never yet had a naked girl of any vocation float across my ceiling, and I find the stated situation quite . . . titillating, if you will.
CONCERNED because I picture this poor cowgirl floating like a balloon caught in a cross breeze, bumping her head on the ceiling as she skitters back and forth. Please tell me the breeze is not provided by a ceiling fan.
PERPLEXED because if she was naked, how did you determine her profession? I would expect that if she were at least wearing cowboy boots and a cowboy hat, then one could accurately pinpoint "Cowgirl", and also the hat would protect her head against the ceiling fan, which I still regard as a dangerous idea. However, even these small concessions to identify her livelihood would render her "partially clothed" instead of "naked".
Furthermore, if you will permit, if we have already gone so far as to allow the iconic hat and boots, might we then also include chaps and a small open vest, with a sherrif's star? I would appreciate it, even if it does nothing to alleviate the inaccuracy brought about by characterizing the young lady as "naked".
Also, a lasso.
I would appreciate your attention to this matter.
Sincerely,
Ian
Furthermore, if you will permit, if we have already gone so far as to allow the iconic hat and boots, might we then also include chaps and a small open vest, with a sherrif's star? I would appreciate it, even if it does nothing to alleviate the inaccuracy brought about by characterizing the young lady as "naked".
Also, a lasso.
I would appreciate your attention to this matter.
Sincerely,
Ian
