Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Things I Have Learned From Walking 45 Miles a Week For Two Months

My legs look like Wile E. Coyote's after he ate the whole bottle of Leg Muscle Vitamins (, but my feet feel like Kathy Bates' Misery character took a sledgehammer to them.

My really good work shoes last two months instead of half a year.

I have lost twenty pounds and my clothes look like I stole them from my Dad's dresser.

I have gained the ability to sit on the sofa for the entire weekend without moving. My wife and son have constructed a blanket sled to drag me to the bathroom.

Sleep is a precious, life-sustaining commodity, precious as fairy semen or the golden heart of a unicorn.